i havent felt like this in so many moons...

so, this is my 19th time seeing another year come to pass. i will be twenty years old in just four full months. this is absolutely amazing to me... i remember turning ten years old as if it was last week. I was so damn excited about double digits... and now i have doubled that! it amazes me really. but for now i shall not think about my birthday or losing my title as a teenager, as that is a long time away and i wont even be in this country.
oh i am optmistic for the year ahead. i don't have any expectations or anything, i just pray to god to keep a low profile and low level of excitement and drama. i dont think it could possibly be difficult to have less than last year. i wont be eating meat for one thing! i am so thrilled about this resolution, as i know i will keep it. i have already decided that if it would be annoying to my host family i will eat meat while there, as that would be rude, but for the most part i doubt i will miss it, i have never much appreciated large hunks of meat anyway (excpet for that damn good steak i grilled 4th or 5th week). (actually it had to have been like 6th or 7th week). (maybe later even).

i am returning to chicago tomorrow. i have not yet packed, and my do i have a lot to gather up. but i hope to be there by mid to late afternoon. i think john is supposed to be back, it would be nice to have some relaxing time before everyone else gets back... i pick candace up sunday morning from o'hare and jon is living in dudley house again with geoff! oh what a wonderful quarter this will be. speaking of jon, he did indeed call me around 2 tonight, clearly a drunk dial, i think it was shocking to him that i was not out partying nor drunk, but this seems to be how most of my new years tend to roll. there was the joyous new years eve 2001 when the Al letter was written by heba and myself. a few new years with just my parents... well, not that my parents haven't had their share of crazy new years eve parties... every year up until i was like 8 years old we had so many strangers in our house on new years you would have thought my parents were like frat brothers or something. i never partied on new years in high school, always a quiet night in with my boy, or heba. movies and carson and dick clark, its the way ashley way i guess.
meh, it was a very enjoyable night. andrew and i went and saw finding neverland, it was very good. quiet and nice, just the way i hope the year goes.

well i shoudl get some sleep if i intend to get up at a decent hour to pack.

happy new year!